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Result - Lord Caernarvon's XI

Sat Jul 17th Grannies Won by 93 runs

Match report

On a sunny day in Berkshire, the Grannies met in various states of disrepair to take on a spirited Lord Carnarvon's XI.

The air was damp and three sizeable covers had been removed from the square(sadly none had actually been used to cover our track). Frank lost the toss and was put in to bat on a wet track.

Jay Stockham and Matt Gullick strode out to face the oppo's opening attack not knowing what the wet track would offer them. Plenty of movement in the air and off the pitch was the answer.....
Matt perished early on lbw. Jay was joined by Frank, who set about wildly slashing at thin air whilst the oppo skipper (Alex Rushent - fellow Granny) chirped constantly in his ear. Frank departed 30 mins later having drilled an off drive straight in to the hands of the eager fielder, who having desperately tried to get out of the way, eventually pouched the ball at the 2nd attempt.
Greg Chapman, our ubiquitious Aussie, strode out, had a quick look, adjusted his John Deere baseball cap and then set about smashing the bowling all over the park....he was also providing excellent catching practice to the oppo. Greg survived some unbelievable drops and lunch was taken by an expectant/hopeful Grannies side.

Greg, on the orders of the skipper, was to dig in, bat for 30 mins after lunch and see how things were going. Sadly, 3 balls after lunch, Greg was back in the pavillion having finally been caught at the 5th attempt.

Hamish Smellie went in at 5 but was bowled by an increasingly irate Alex Rushent...it was then that the Grannies played their masterstroke.....Sean Renard went in at 6 and wound the opposition up so much that teapots were appearing all over the outfield. Al Rushent (by now more angry than raging bull) started throwing up bombs....Sean missed/swiped/kicked but sadly didn't actually hit any of them. Sean and Jay put on a partnership of 96 runs (of which Sean contributed 15). Sean's innings was just the perfect Granny innings...the oppo were just furious and Sean was completely oblivious to the whole situation. Dom Ely and Bob Robinson both went in at the end and the Grannies declared on 271 for 7.

For the observant amongst you, you may have noticed that not many runs were scored by the Grannies previously mentioned, this is deliberate because Jay Stockham played the kind of Bradmanesque innings, we all have frankly dreamt about but never managed.
Jay scored a truly magnificant 171 not out....
Jay carried his bat throughout the whole Grannies innings and never looked like getting out. What you have to bear in mind is that when Jay went in, the wicket was soaked, the ball was moving around both in the air and off the pitch....he did not at any stage look like getting out. Jay built an innings, without chance, which was an absolute delight to watch. He punished savagely any wayward bowling, kept a strong resolute defence and produced a batting masterclass. It was an honour to watch it. In fact, I don't believe that there has ever been a better innings in the history of our great club. Jay should be rightly proud of his performance, really there is not much more to say than it was an astonishing batting innings.

Unbeknown to the skipper, Jay was 5 runs short of the all time individual record score on Lord Carnarvon's ground....and may be a few runs short of the highest ever Grannies innings.
The skipper, deeming that sufficient damage had been done to the oppo's bowling attack, declared and set the oppo a decent total on a drying pitch.

Grannies opened their bowling with Bob Robinson and Greg Chapman....both bowled straight, with venom and were frankly too strong for the oppo. Bob soon had one of the openers back in the hutch, meanwhile Al Rushent was starting to wind up to another sizeable innings. Al was providing catching practice to the Grannies, all of which would never normally have been caught but it was one of those Grannies days where anything was possible. Alastair Smellie made an excellent attempt at an unreachable catch, getting his hands to it, but sadly it didn't stick. Al was winding up the willow and started to smash the ball to the fence. A reasonable partnership was building until the game changed in a moment of batting madness.

Al, having smashed the ball to the outfield, stood and admired his shot, eventually he decided to run but at this stage his batting partner was happily in his crease going nowhere....Al ran to the bowlers end to swap Victoria Sponge recipes with his batting partner(well, I can't think of any other reason why he was there!) Hamish Smellie (aka Jonty Rhodes) threw to the bowlers end, the ball was then thrown to the keeper and Sean did the rest. Al was out by a country mile.

The Grannies had a bonus wicket and from there, they never looked back. Lord Carnarvon's XI fought valiantly to keep the innings going but a mortal blow had been landed. Bob Robinson (8 ovrs, 1 for 25), Greg Chapman (7 overs 1 for 28), Dom Ely (5 overs 2 for 16), Gerald Slocock (5 ovrs 1 for 35), Alastair Smellie (5 ovrs 1 for 34) and Patrick Cobb (5 ovrs 3 for 32) formed a formidable attack and never allowed the oppo to get their innings properly going. (Has there ever been so much bowling in one Grannies side???)

We knew the game was up when Gerald, standing at slip, caught an absolute blinder off Greg's bowling....the look on Gerald's face when he realised it had stuck in his left hand was memorable!

The skipper, being the generous soul that he is (!) decided to drop an absolute dolly and rightly attracted numerous derisory comments from his fellow Grannies....

Victory eventually came when Patrick Cobb removed Lord Carnarvon.....Caught Slocock, Bowled Cobb (when was the last time a batsman was out caught Slocock, bowled Cobb??).

It was one of those balmy summer's days where the Grannies resembled a proper cricket team. A great day, great venue, great oppo...many thanks to Lord Carnavon for hosting the game.

Lets hope we get invited again next year....because frankly lightning can't strike twice.....can it?

Match info

What more do I have to say than this game is played on one of the foremost private estates in the country. The lunches and teas are legendary, the welcome warm, the bar is well stocked. A beautiful ground in a beautiful estate - this game is perfect to bring the family along to. Roll out the picnic blanket, watch Lord Carnarvon updating the scoreboard and the Grannies running around in the field. This game is one not to be missed!!!

Location
Highclere Castle,
Newbury,
RG20 9RN